6 Feng Shui Steps to Healing from a Separation or Divorce

sep_divHow can Feng Shui help with post divorce/separation healing? The following six steps are a great start!

1.  Remove the obvious signs of a break-up—missing furniture and pictures!  According to Feng Shui, your environment speaks to you and has a major impact on how you view the world.  I’ve been in client homes (often men) months—sometimes years—after the sad day—yet the rooms are half empty, missing sofas, kitchen tables, and even dishes, while walls retain the outlines of pictures long gone.

The only message from half empty rooms is loss!  To make your life feel whole again, make your room feel whole! Get a new couch, replace the pictures, buy a new set of dishes, and remember, an adult living room requires more than a flat screen TV and a folding chair.

2.  Remove pictures with the missing partner—in Feng Shui, these pictures send constant reminder messages of happier times, even if you think you don’t notice them.  Even if the former love is in the middle of family shots, remove these photos from bureaus and walls and pack them away in a safe place—at least until you are over the worst of the pain and loss.

3.  Store the ex’s possession in a storage locker, not your garage or attic!  I had a client who was unable to make a clear separation from her husband.  The energy changed when she finally moved out his tools and equipment that were spread throughout the garage.

4.  Stop checking up on your ex on Facebook—in Feng Shui, the rule is where you place your attention, your energy flows.  If you spend time daily tracking his or her new loves, new fun activities, you will have little time or emotional energy to develop a new life of your own.

5.  Remove the ex’s belongings from your bedroom—in Feng Shui, the center for relationship energy is in the bedroom.  Therefore, make cleaning out the ex’s belongings a priority to start the healing.

Remove the DVDs left behind, the love letters in a box in the closet (or in a file in your computer, but that’s another blog), the teddy bear he won for you at last year’s state fair, the framed wedding announcement (!!) she made for you.

You don’t have to dispose of everything—healing takes time.  Just put the objects that remind you of your ex into a big box, seal up, and store somewhere out of the bedroom—preferably at a friend or relative’s house where you won’t be tempted to nostalgically rummage through the box as you sip—or gulp your favorite anesthetizing beverage.

6.  Last and not least, don’t keep your wedding ring, diamond, or other special jewelry from your ex in your jewelry box or change plate where you see it every time you get a pair of earrings or toss in coins from your pocket.

And don’t carry your wedding set around in your briefcase for years because you wanted to get an estimate at a few jewelry stores, but never found the time to actually do it!  (I’ll let that true story be anonymous).

Sell the jewelry, give it to friend to dispose of, or add it to the big box (see #5).

Feng Shui tells us when we remove the daily reminders of lost love, we make room to find ourselves again as a single person—and eventually to make space, both literally and figuratively, for new love.  Gabriele Amersbach, Lucky Path Feng Shui

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